Chapter 22: Living with Flexibility
“If you want to become whole, let yourself be partial.
If you want to become straight, let yourself be crooked.
If you want to become full, let yourself be empty.
If you want to be reborn, let yourself die.
If you want to be given everything, give everything up.
The gentle overcomes the rigid.
The slow overcomes the fast.
Become like the Tao.
Then you can become truly yourself.”
This verse reveals a deep truth of the Tao: flexibility and surrender are not weaknesses — they are ultimate strength. In nature, the most enduring structures are not rigid but fluid: think of water flowing around rocks or bamboo bending in the storm.
Wayne Dyer encourages us to shift from control and resistance to yielding and softness. True power, according to the Tao, comes from adaptability, humility, and the willingness to let go of the ego’s need to be “right,” “strong,” or “in charge.”
To live with flexibility means embracing paradox, practicing surrender, and responding to life’s changes with grace rather than force.
Key Concepts:
Flexibility leads to freedom.
Softness and yielding are signs of spiritual maturity.
Letting go allows wholeness to emerge.
True strength is found in openness, not resistance.
Actionable Steps: Living with Flexibility
- Practise Yielding Instead of Forcing
- In conflict or decision-making, ask: “How can I bend without breaking?”
- Let go of needing to win or control an outcome.
- Adopt the Beginner’s Mind
- Be open to learning even when you think you know.
- Stay curious rather than attached to being “right.”
- Welcome Life’s Contradictions
- When plans shift or things go “wrong,” respond with: “How is this serving me?”
- Trust that detours are often divine redirections.
- Release the Need to Appear Perfect or Strong
- Share your vulnerabilities.
- Let yourself be seen — crooked, partial, uncertain — and discover the freedom of authenticity.
- Meditate on Water
- Visualise yourself as water: flowing, bending, soft yet unstoppable.
- Use this imagery in daily life when you feel rigid or stuck.
- Allow Emotions to Flow Without Clinging
- Let sadness, anger, joy, or fear arise and pass like waves.
- Don’t resist or analyse — just feel and allow.
- Reframe Challenges as Opportunities to Adapt
- When something “interrupts” your plan, breathe and ask: “What’s life showing me now?”
Affirmation for Chapter 22:
“I bend, and I do not break. I trust life’s flow and let go of resistance. My softness is my strength.”